Five films I will never see. I don't care how great you say they are.

I am a film lover. A geek even. I watch a lot of them, good and bad. There are plenty of films that I need to see such as classics that have been on my to do list for years (i.e. Casablanca, Maltese Falcon, Some Like It Hot, etc.) I will always remember that I need to see those movies and someday I probably will. However there are some movies that I have absolutely no interest in and can immediately guarantee disdain. Sure, this may be unreasonable, but we all do it. Right? Anyway, here's my top five films that I will never see. 

1. "Twilight" - Sure everybody in America loves this shit. What's not to love about the fictitious romance between a vampire and some high school chick? The fact of the matter is "Twilight" is written by a Mormon housewife. Mormon housewives should have no say in vampires. Nor should they be allowed to fill young girls heads with unrealistic views of love and devotion. I guarantee I'm not the only guy in the world who has been judged because he is "no Edward". I'm sorry that there are no werewolves for me to fight off in real life and I find it creepy to watch you while you sleep all night. 

2. "Mamma Mia" - A movie based off of a play based on the music of ABBA. Enough said. 

3. "Saw" - When "Saw" was released, I wanted to see it. I was going through a phase of watching fucked up, independent, horror films. I didn't see it because of some reason I can't remember (probably lack of funds, or laziness), but now for every year that goes by that I don't see it, four or five "Saw" sequels are released. I don't want to get sucked into that franchise, and what better way to do that than by refusing to see the origin? 

4. "Gladiator" - Big fight scenes and scantily clad Mediterranean men don't move films up my Netflix queue. "Spartacus" aside, I can't think of one that has made it to my queue in the first place. I don't care how amazing the effects are or how "badass" the fighting is, I don't have three hours to watch Russell Crowe shit on celluloid. 

5. "This Is It" - Here's the thing. Michael Jackson did his thing. I don't think I really ever liked his music, but I can respect what he did, sorta. I mean the guy is kinda responsible for the existence of scene-specific choreographed dancing in any music video (see B.E.T.) and I don't know how much I like that. ANYWAY, I digress. "This Is It", as discussed by many, is a product of publicity. It is a perfect example of taking advantage of current news to make money. And I don't l know if I would've been to keen to going to an M.J. concert while he was alive, let alone watching the making of one. Who knows? This one might be watched. But it'll be for free and somebody else will have to press play. 


Stay tuned for more lists.